When a friend of mine was fired from his job because of his boss’s mistake, he said, “All is good.” The next week, when one of his kids totaled one of their cars, my friend said, “I trust God will work everything out for the good.” We met the next week for coffee. When I asked how he was doing, he snapped, “I’m fine. Of course I’m okay. I have faith.”
The thing was, his demeanor was agitated not peaceful; he oozed anxiety.
A few weeks later his transmission died, and he phoned me saying, “What the hell is God doing!” His worries had vanished. Instead of being fearful, he was angry.
It was not an improvement.
I have met scores of believers who try to keep a stiff upper lip, or refuse to voice a negative thought, or speak only positive platitudes. I’ve even talked with Christians who deny they are getting sick in the midst of fever, chills, and a hacking cough. They think that any acceptance of a negative situation is a form of living in doubt.
But I’ve never seen their doubt improved by self-deception.
Doubts Meet Reality
Seventy years ago, Norman Vincent Peale published one of the most influential self-help books of all time: The Power of Positive Thinking. And its message infected our culture like the plague (or maybe like Covid).
Christians and atheists alike confused faith with a self-hypnotic mantra of repeating “I can do all things in Christ” ten times a day. Twenty times would be better.
The Power of Positive Thinking is heretical, but heresies only work when they look like the real thing. Peale’s version has faith, but its faith is in its level of faith rather than faith in God. And it completely ignores Scripture. When all sorts of terrors inflict Job, he screams, rips his robes, shaves his head, and sits in a pile of ashes. And Scripture says, “In all this, Job sinned not.”
Maybe Job should have read The Power of Positive Thinking. Probably not.
Real faith looks at reality with eyes wide open, and whenever we examine reality with real honesty, our doubts begin to surface. Always.
Because if God’s nature is infinite, then our limited understanding of Him always falls short of His reality. Which means our sense of reality and His true reality are in conflict.
Jesus Always Reveals Our Doubt
It is not spiritually wrong to admit our doubts. It is spiritually honest.
Spiritual growth only takes place when God’s ultimate reality confronts our limited (and false) reality. That is why Jesus constantly exposes our doubts. He is inciting spiritual growth. Not that He makes us to doubt, but because we already do doubt. We just won’t admit it.
Jesus commanded his disciples to forgive their repenting brother seventy times seven times in one day. When they hear this command, they cry, “Give us faith.” It was their way of admitting their doubts.
Which exactly what Jesus wanted in the first place.
When Jesus told his disciples to feed the crowd of 5,000, they said to send the crowd home. Why did Jesus give them a command they felt they couldn’t do? To reveal their doubts.
Our present reality isn’t big enough to forgive without limits or to feed many thousand. We think we have faith, but our faith is in our natural selves: we can forgive a few times and feed a few people. We don’t know our doubts till Jesus shows us His true spiritual realities.
Jesus does not fear our imperfect sense of reality. Instead, he constantly incites reactions in us to reveal our doubts so we can grow into a deeper and truer spiritual understanding. Our true doubts don’t die until they are illuminated by His spiritual truth.
We grow most when we take our most perplexing questions to God and look to him to stretch our minds beyond our dinky realities into a new understanding of Him. His provocations bring us into deeper dependence on Him. If we are willing to explore our doubts.
As Einstein once said, “Never lose a holy curiosity.” Even when we doubt.
Sam
The Life of God in Us
AMEN (times 1000).
Our culture tries to make “I don’t understand” equivalent to doubting. And sure, not understanding often provides fertile ground for doubt to grow. Yet I have come to the conclusion that, if I ever start to feel/think that I understand God, then I have made myself equal to God, and I am being Idolatrous. I will never fully understand God, but this is not the same as doubting him.
Thank you so much.
As a teen I became an atheist for almost a quarter century because a beautiful older lady, (and minister’s daughter) responded to my question about God & suffering – by responding that I was a horrible, disgusting creature she despised. She was director of a girls’ camp and stated that she’d have sent me home had it not been almost the end of camp. She warned me not to associate with any of my friends for fear I might infect them. And it went on….with non-verbal signals of utter repulsion. I was stunned, and walked out thinking “if this lady whom I’ve idealized says I’m disgusting, I must be too disgusting for God. Forget that.
From that point I could have been on an atheist debating team.
I was converted by revelation – not seeking, not looking; not by a book or a building. I’ve since met 54 people with the same experience. I think Jesus said: ok, you’re a bottom line person so we’re getting to the bottom line with a big billboard in the middle of the road.
Thank goodness I now know what you’ve written is true – God is way big enough to handle any questions we have.
Again thank you.
So well said, Sam. You get right to the heart of the problem.
Even after Jesus fed the 5000, the disciples continued to doubt. In the very next chapter of Matthew, they witnessed Jesus healing so many that the crowds were amazed. But once again they ran out of food. And once again the disciples doubted that they could get enough bread to feed them all.
This is me! I see Jesus feed my 5000. I stand amazed as He heals so many around me. And yet, when I run out of food again, I doubt. I’m so glad the Holy Spirit inspired Matthew to include all of this in his Gospel. I need to have my doubts exposed over and over again in order to grow. But that’s okay. So did the disciples.
I just watched (again) (with my pastor) The Sunset Limited, about a convicted murderer turned evangelist helping a suicidal professor facing deep personal traumas boosted by disturbing existentialist philosophy. Our church is a rural church filled with good people with simple faith. This time watching TSL, I could say that, of whatever version of Christian faith I could embrace, it would have to be able to handle the worst that those two challenges (trauma plus existentialism) could come up with–at least, for me to confidently stand in Christ and have something to confidently give to others.
All of which brings me back to responding to your article. Telling the truth to ourselves all the time, especially at the small assaults and losses, is important so that we don’t get overwhelmed when big things happen. I couldn’t travel cross the country to get to my grandson’s graduation, and he said, “That’s all right,” and I said, “No, It’s not all right.” Even if I couldn’t get there, I don’t have to compound the problem by dissimulating/lying about whether it’s alright or not. And about facing unending trials of life, if our faith can’t handle the ordinary, they certainly can’t handle the big trials–like your friend experienced. That’s my understanding anyway.
This is great, so well explained. The need to doubt – to be honest with our human condition and God’s divine mystery – are essential for spiritual growth and moving into deep, mature faith. And yet I have encountered so many Christians (especially pastors) who do not allow themselves or others the space to doubt. My husband was talking with a pastor friend once about the youth we used to have in our youth group. The pastor said wearily, “They’re nowhere with God now.” But my husband shook his head, “I don’t think so, I think they are where they need to be, challenging, doubting and asking questions.” I wish that pastors preached this more often, letting people know that doubt isn’t the end, but just the beginning.
Excellent post, as always, Sam!
As believers we need to understand he “complete definition” of “Faith”.
In that, we may find we are complete in Jesus, and that there is no longer any benefit to ourselves in “”wallowing in doubt”. Amen?